Act 1 Scene 4 Flashcards
LYDIA. I am not afraid. For though I am the youngest, I’m the stoutest!
A rich bachelor in the neighborhood, Jane! Whatever shall you do to get him in your clutches? One of us must save the family, after all, and you are the likeliest champion.
JANE. Me, Lizzy? Why not you?
Me? I am an ugly, sharp-tongued awkward little creature, but you are good and kind and about five times prettier than any other girl in the county. No, no, you shall have to fall on Mr. Bingley’s sword, and be quick about it too–the clock is ticking for us old maids!
LYDIA. Why shouldn’t I catch him?
MARY. Or me!
Lydia, you are much too young to think of such things, and Mary, you–
JANE. Lizzy is talking a lot of nonsense, girls. As usual.
Yes, we are only joking.
LYDIA. Why should you pretend love and marriage and all that is a joke? It seems very serious to me.
That is because you are far away from it. When you’re closer to the prospect, it becomes much too frightening, and you must laugh so you don’t cry. Playing games keeps one sane, when the stakes involved threaten to drive one MAD.
JANE. Stop filling her head with foolishness. It’s not a game, Lydia.
Isn’t it? There are rules, strategies, wins, losses–and it is, theoretically, done for pleasure.
LYDIA. How do you know if you’ve found the right match?
Well. I shouldn’t tell you, but–
LYDIA. Yes?
You know you’ve met the right one when–
LYDIA.–yes?
A lightning bold shoots down from the sky and fries you like an egg!
You probably decide he’s your Perfect Match just after your mamma has finished counting his rich, sickly relatives and your papa has called on his bankers. These things are all arranged above one’s head, Lydia.
JANE. Wordless, and faultless.
LYDIA. Ooooh.
NOW who’s filling her head with nonsense? What novels have you been reading?
JANE. Well, what do YOU really think it is, Elizabeth?
I have no desire to find out! One of you will have to marry to save the family from ruin, for I’ll none of it.
JANE. Oh, you don’t mean that.
I know myself, Jane. I shall never marry. For the state is fundamentally flawed, as far as I can see. It is all…too much. I would, however, make a lovely maiden aunt. So do hurry and make the necessary arrangements with this Mr. Bingley…!
