Act 1 Scene 1 Flashcards
Act 1 Scene 1… ARTY keeps wiping his sweaty brow with his handkerchief.
JAY. I hate coming here, don’t you (sitting on sofa)
ARTY. It’s hot. I’m so hot.
JAY. I’d hate coming here if it was cool. Pop doesn’t even like to come and it’s his own mother… I was so afraid of her when I was a kid. She’d come out of that door with a limp and a cane and looked like she was going to kill you. When I was five, I drew a picture of her and called it “Frankenstein’s Grandma.”
ARTY. Did she ever see it?
JAY. If she did, you’d be an only child today. Pop said she could swing her cane so fast, she could have been more of the greatest golfers in the world.
ARTY. All I remember was, I hated kissing her. It felt like putting your lips on a wrinkled ice cube.
JAY. Yeah, she’s cold all right. She was the only one at mom’s funeral who didn’t cry… I wonder what Pop’s talking so long for. (to door)
ARTY. Because she’s deaf in one ear, isn’t she?
JAY. Yeah… Did you ever notice there’s something wrong with everyone on Pop’s side of the the family? Mom used to tell me that (back to sofa)
ARTY.: She didn’t tell me. Like who?
JAY. Like all of them. Like Aunt Bella… She’s a little (points to head)… you know… closed for repairs.
ARTY. I don’t care, I like here. Nicer than “hot house” Grandma.
JAY. I didn’t say she wasn’t nice. But she’s got marbles rolling around up there … Mom said she got that way because when she was a kid, Granma kept hitting her in the head every time she did something stupid… which only made her stupider.
ARTY. (lays on the floor, in front of the sofa). She wasn’t stupid at making great ice cream sodas.
JAY. Horray! Wonderful! She’s 35 years old and she can make ice cream sodas. They don’t give you a high school diploma for getting the cherry on top of the whipped cream.
ARTY: She went to high school?
JAY. A little. She missed the first year because she couldn’t find it.
